Sunday, 3 March 2013

Tealights, horsemeat and health

So despite a very busy few days of fun I've managed to get my ass up early this morning and make a little time to blog. Last night I was made an amazing vegan dinner and this morning woke up with equally amazing thank you farts.  Farts that when I took the dog out were still waiting for me 7 minutes later when I got back in the house.  Still worth the great dinner and conversation.  I also managed to "borrow" a copy of this years Ikea Catalogue.

I love the Ikea catalogue more then the store almost.  The beautiful rooms all done up and happy possible Swedish and the odd Asian models in happy home life scenes.  Amazing.  Ikea has always had a special place in my heart.  I think it's more the act of going.  I went the first time with a friend from College years ago and have maybe gone 8 or 10 times.  Mostly with my gay guy friends.  The greatest trips to the store have been early on weekdays when the store is not full of fighting couples and people in general.  So full that you can't enjoy the visit.  See, that's the thing.  For those of us here in London to get to Burlington or Toronto for an Ikea visit it's a big deal.  It involves planning and excitement.

My meat soul mate Jason lives about 5 minutes away from one just outside Toronto. He and his wife think nothing of taking the kids for breakfast for a dollar and dumping them in the ball pit for an hour while they go shopping either in the store or close by.  Amazing.  They can just run over for stuff.  That would be deadly for some of us if they actually built an Ikea in London.  That rumour has been around as long as I can remember.  Seriously, every year or so someone tells me "they are going to build one in Hyde Park" or where ever there is some new construction.  Lies.  I never get excited anymore...ever. 

I honestly do not get why they don't open one here.  We have a University and College for fuck sakes!  There is millions of dollars in discount furniture sales for students right there!  September would be a nightmare to get near the store but amazing sales.  *Fun Fact.  London has more retail sales for back to school then it does for Christmas.  Or it used to.  Seriously!*  That fun fact alone deserves an Ikea! 

I have had 3 Ikea sofas now.  The one I have now I found online and though stylish its not as comfortable as the long blue one I had.  I loved that one.  It was as big as a single bed to lay on and back when I got it and this house (both were 4th hand) I had a great time breaking that sofa in with my girlfriend at the time.  I miss that sofa.  Great for naps and I think about 7 of my friends loved it for drunken sleepovers.  No one peed it either.  Thanks guys. 

I've only eaten at Ikea once or twice. I didn't eat the meatballs, I know that for sure.  I don't trust non homemade meatballs, they never seem to agree with me.  Now with all the fuss about eating horse meat I honestly think people need to figure it out.  Yes, I might be the worst person trying to be a vegan ever in the history of people trying to be vegan but come on.  What do you expect from companies trying to make as much money as possible?  If you want to know what is in your food then make it yourself.  I found out last year that all most all Harvey's burgers are made with soy.  Check it out.

Think about this.  Depending on how the horses were raised their meat could be leaner.  I am guessing if it found its way into dollar meatballs and fast food burgers they were raised for slaughter.  I learned long ago there are too many horses out there thanks to HRT (hormone replacement therapy) since only pregnant horses pee makes the HRT stuff.  (Gross)  So they keep horses pregnant and out come more horses.  Since we all don't have our own horse you can imagine how many extras there are.  Personally I'm good looking slightly manly and having night sweats.  I don't want to ingest horse all. 

Its funny how the vegan granola crunchers I used to make fun of are now making sense.  I honestly think people are tired of all the crap in food.  Crap is ok here and there but I make it a point to buy as little canned food or processed shit as possible.  Yesterday I saw this and had to say something about it.  Now outside of summer if your kid is eating that many hot suck as a parent.  I'm sorry I'm not a parent but come on.  I got thinking that now in schools you can bring peanut butter so kids sandwiches are lunch meat.  I'm guessing not the good kid like a fresh ham or turkey but the shit kind you get in a package.  Baloney is basically flat hot dogs and I've known people who feed their kids that daily. I bet that's 12 hot dogs a month.

Now I get that kids are picky and that's fine.  But trust me parents.  Diabetes, fucked up hormones and high blood pressure is picky too.  It always picks those of us who ate like frat boys for too long and expected to be picked last like we were in school for sports.  Little secret...that is our chance to get picked first. 

So I plan on continuing to do my best to take better care of myself.  Today that starts with a hot tea and slowly flipping my way into the new Ikea catalogue thinking about a road trip when I'm back on my shopping day trip feet. 

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