Ah. My favourite day to blog. I was even happy to take the dog out and be woken up by the crisp morning picking up two tootsie rolls of dog poop behind him. One of my favourite things is brushing my teeth and going out in the cold air, it feels amazing. I actually brush my teeth before going out in cold weather just so I can enjoy that 5 minutes of cold mouth excitement.
So, yesterday I made the decision to restart my video game. I had basically finished it and with the extras I downloaded they were not going to work unless I went back to the beginning. It was heartbreaking but needed. My mom asked what I was doing and I tried to explain it to her. Lets back up. So before Christmas I got a play station 3. I hooked up net flicks to it and it's been amazing. I love it. My buddy Rex loaned me a few games and I fell in love with Red Dead Redemption. It's a western game where you are trying to find and kill people who wronged you to get your family back. You get to hunt, kill bad guys and help people. My mother of course has her own take on it. "It sounds an awful lot like that game you played in public school." "What game Ma? Oregon Trail?" I was thinking that she would never remember that. "Yeah...that was fun. I played it a few times when you weren't around." I remembered she liked the hunting mostly because when she was young my grandfather didn't let her shoot a gun. "Well this game is a little more adult. I get a horse, guns and actually blow peoples heads off if I stand close enough to them." She was quiet for a second and said "Well...I can see why you like it so much."
I used to think video games were for kids and teen boys with no hope of a girl touching their penis until the end of college but a few years ago when Rock Band was all the rage I saw women in their 30's and 40's loving the game. For one woman I worked with it was a family thing. She and her husband would play with the kids and when they went to bed they would play together. I don't have the coordination for Rock Band but I fell in love with the western game I've been playing. Its funny playing and thinking about it from a girl point of view. I had my buddy play with me once and he laughed at my excitement when I got a new outfit to change my character into. I am a girl after all.
I think starting over sucked basically because as a girl I wanted to see how the story line panned out. I don't think boys care about things like that but I wanted to know if he was going to kill who he needed to and get back with his wife and son. When that happened I was thrilled...then was thinking "Fuck...now what?" It lost it's luster after that and again when the main character dies and his son takes over with no real powers or story lines. Blows.
So back I go again playing from the start with all the knowledge I learned the first time, Don't you wish life was that way? You could go back to the last big save of the game and start over with a clean-ish slate and all the mistakes made and lessons learned. Who wouldn't? I don't know exactly where I would have made a big save. I think maybe after college? I think I would have (back then) continued on to University for Library stuff (it was way cheaper back then), gotten my BA and hopes for a career. I think I would have made a library career awesome in my own way back then. Either way I would have stayed in school.
On the redo I would have maybe missed out on buying this house but I do think I would have managed to find a great job and maybe an equally cool house. I guess I would have lost a lot in the redo too. Relationships both great and bad, friendships both good and bad and maybe pets. (They were all good.) I do think the biggest redo I would have done would have been my college and university education. Its not that I'm too old now...it's that I'm in a different place now. I'm at that comfortable with my life place and I get that I could do a total shake up and go back to school, but I am not in a place to loose what I have. Or risk it.
So, with everything I learned over the years would I be more successful or happy if I when back to a big save in the game of life? I'm sure there would be parts of me that would be much happier and a little more settled but what fun is that? I would have missed out on a lot of fun and experiences that have made me laugh, hate, grow, run, stay, fall in love, out of love, almost get arrested and of course find happiness in things big and small.
I really hope I still enjoy the game starting almost over with some downloaded updates. If not then on to the next game. Maybe not another western.